Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Back to blogging

i recently feel that i need a channel to do my diary writing again... there has been too much in my thoughts and i find no outlets to let it out. I did think of writing it down in my physical diary, which i used to do so for the past few years, but ever since i moved house last yr, i decided not to continue...

this year has been a very busy & packed year for me.... i rarely have spare time to do nothing. some mths, i might be doing a number of things at e same time, which means i need to really multi tasks. though after a few weeks, i got the hang of it, but i am really physically, mentally drained. this year is extremely busy, but a pity, not many people understand my feelings. i am not saying i want someone to pity me or show sympathy. just tat i hope some1 can understand my frustration, situation, grumbles, feelings, constraints etc.

Just as when we have re structured our service model, and i am so close to finish my cases on hand, now my most sensitive case might face a dismissal from employer. Well, there is no way i can explain further here. 

Suddenly, i felt discouraged and i am not sure if i have done wrongly right from the start. Yes, my RO might be right. i am easily discouraged. I am feeling stressed. Though by talking to some of my friends would definitely help, but ultimately is me myself. Can i overcome this hurdle on my own? i think i can, all i need is some time. 

i dont know if what i have been insisting is right, what i have been doing is right, what i have been planning is right. The only thing i know is, i have done my best. Initially, i tot tat being able to find him a job is already a miracle. sustained in a job for 6months n more is already a bonus. but now, it seems that everything is like a bubble, burst and vanish, back to square one, MAYBE. 

Where is the confidence i used to have? i realised i have changed, but dunno for the good or the worse. i kind of lost myself, lost to what i dunno.. who can tell me? i dun dare to tell hubby too much of work matters, coz i dun want him to feel irritated. so, i try to keep it all to myself. n i find myself crying easily than b4 too. what is wrong.... maybe i need a trip to refresh again. i may feel better after that, i never know. Or isit really time for me to move on.... 

Friday, September 11, 2015

Pre-celebration of Le Xuan's 1st birthday 11-09-15

Today is the polling day, so is PH for us. Done our vote in e morn, n afternoon went to my bro's side for Xuan's birthday party!

Le Xuan's birthday is next week, but they decided to hold it earlier as her bday lies on a weekday.

They held the party at the shelter near their block. Well, e haz

e was really bad yest, n today suddenly it was great! Xuan's birthday theme is Carebears! 

They ordered buffet n the cake from Prima. We reached ard 1.30pm, n stayed throughout til near to 5pm. Both Js were obedient surprisingly!!! Normally Jaden will fuss n not wanting to take photo etc. Jav sometimes fuss too. But today, they were great! Thank u boys!

Hubby brought Jaden to the playgrd a few times as he couldnt stay still at all, as usual. Jav was enjoying playing with my cousin Annabel. N he was happy! When the party ended, we needed to help keep things, Jav even helped to move heavy things together with my dad.

We had a great time today, n Xuan was happy too, though in e beginning she did fuss as she was tired. But when she got up, she was ok. Jav skipped nap as he was having fun. Jaden has stopped nap for a long time.

I went to purchase a voucher online to customise a storybook for Xuan. Hopefully she can cultivate a good habit for reading, n a red pkt for her.

It was a short n yet happy occasion for our precious princess in the family. She is well loved by every1. She has many presents today, n hope she enjoyed herself too! Le Xuan, may u continue to grow up happily under the uncondition love & care from your parents n from all of us. We all love u so much. Grow up to be a good & smart girl. U r always e most precious princess in the family!

Javier turns 4!

I didnt want my kids to grow up that fast, but time doesnt stop for ani1. Javier turned 4 this year.

I applied leave, so that i can spend some private time with him. He poor thing, never go aniwhere b4 like Jaden. Tats y i brought him to e zoo

last yr when he was 3. So, this year i decided to bring him to Bird Park.

Haze was bad recently, but thank God for everything. On e day itself on 8th, weather was good. I told him e day b4 his bday that i will bring him to the Bird Park, n he said ok. Well, he did enjoy the trip i should say.

We watched 2 shows, n he was happy. It's like an eye-opener to him. We only spent a few hrs there, mainly bcoz i cannot stand e heat!

Evening, hubby bought a cake as instructed. It's his fav Thomas the Train. He doesnt eat cake, neither does Jaden. We had a simple celebration at home for him. I felt tired celebrating birthdays with tonnes of friends & relatives. Too tiring.

Javier is a fierce boy to his brother. I always hope he can be more loving, though sometimes they do love each other alot. Jav's skin condition improved alot after we brought him to see the chinese med doc recommended by my sec sch frd. It really helps though it was exp.

Seeing them laugh n happy is my happiness. All i wish is they r healthy & happy. Haze is bad, n i kept praying that they dun fall sick, n i have to b careful too as my health is poor. Pls be a more sensible boy ok? Your name represents bright... so i hope your life is bright n good. Happy blessed birthday my little boy! We love u always!

Friday, August 21, 2015

Change of mobile model

I always change my mobile model within 24 months. This is the 1st time i will ever shoot after 24 months.

I was always thinking which to change.. change this or tat.. until i decided to change to Note 5.

Initially was abit tempted to change to S6, but still i find it small for my big palm. Yesterday was my 10yr of getting my car license... so decided to reward myself by buying the Note5.

Besides that, i oso bought the original Samsung powerbank. I had 1 actually, but since i do not have an external batt for this model, i would need 1 more powerbank to standby then. I cannot get used to hp dying without extra backup. Somemore the powerbank is light blue in colour, very nice!

I have to start to get used to Note... As my previous is S4. I havent gotten e casing yet, so need to quickly get 1... Hope this phone serves me well loh... I got 64GB since cannot put sd card, haha. 

Happy that i managed to change hp again! 

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Javier was down with HFMD

Tue night, when Javier was asleep, i suddenly realised something was not v right. I saw many red popped up spots on his soles, n then i tried to look at his mouth, n spotted 3 ulcers on e lips. What worried me was HFMD.

Then i tried to recall if there's any unusual behaviour for the past few days. Yes indeed, his appetite was bad, n a few times he cannot finish his milk.

Decided to bring him see doc, and as what i had guessed, he has kenna HFMD. Faintz. i had to take leave and take care of him. He needed to b isolated from Jaden.

Though with HFMD, he was still active. His appetite became better on friday evening when he actually requested for rice. he ate v little for e past few days, bcoz his throat area oso has a few ulcers. tat explained y he couldnt finish his pancakes, scrambled eggs & milk for those days. Poor boy.

I started to have an ulcer on the tongue area, n 1 on the gum. i was observing myself closely at the same time. By friday night, Javier could finish all his milk n eat quite alot of rice. I guessed his road to recovery is approaching.

Sunday evening, brought him to doc again, n YES! he has recovered fully! Doc said his case is mild n he indeed recovered v fast. Doc helped me checked too, and i am not infected. Phew.

Javier reported back to CC yesterday, n i was also back to work too. exhausted all my CC leave n FCL for 2015 liao. Pray hard nothing bad will happen for the rest of the year... Pray hard!

Saturday, July 18, 2015

Sis left for Ireland

My sis got a job back in Dublin, n left on Wed 15July.

I was sad of course, but for her happiness, she has to go. this is e fact tat we have to accept n wish her for..

it wasnt easy for any1 to see this situation, after all we r all here in spore, n she needs to go so far to pursue her happiness.

I am happy for her tat she is so near to receive her happiness. she wont b happy if she continues to stay here. both my bro n I are married, n now it should be her turn to find hers. she has found, n now she is going after it.

we will still meet though it will b difficult... whenever i think of her, i would feel empty, bcoz i got used to her going Amore with me, going massage with me. from now on, i have to go all on my own. kind of lonely.

without us realising, she has been back for 5 yrs... we had been too comfortable tat we didnt realise about the time that she has been back here in spore. it is not easy to maintain a long distance r/ship, n it was great to see that they have been maintaining it well.

I know happiness is now approaching her, n i feel really happy for my sis. i need some time to adjust w/o her by my side. i was crying badly but i dun want her to see that. it was tough for me.

I wish her happiness n i koe she will be. love u a lot, my dear sis.. hope to see u soon in Ireland.

Sunday, June 14, 2015

I love my prince charming

Many ppl who koe me well enuf should know who my prince charming is... I love him for so many years, n til now i still love him... My idol Julian Cheung Chi Lam

I watched the recent variety show which he participated in, together with his wife Anita Yuen, n 2 other couples on 一路上有你.....

I loved him, he is just too cute n himself.. despite being a 43 year old man, a husband, a father, he is still rather childish... not just his looks... He didnt really changed much after many years.

This show is funny, especially most of the captions... This grp of ppl who created the show is smart i should say.

They recorded this series in Korea. N could see how each couple communicated n loved each other. Chilam & Anita had been together for 20 over years, n i really think it is not easy.

I started liking Chilam when i watched him starring Yang Guo... he always have those roles which is devoted man n always get hurt kind... besides his acting, i super love his big round eyes! n of course his height. It is just so perfect. If i can ever see him in person n take a picture with him, i think i may laugh til cannot sleep. Haha.

Though i dislike his hairdo for 冲上云霄, but his big round eyes make u just cannot take your eyes off him.n of course his dimples too. Oh my, he is just so attractive isnt he?

He may not be the best sweet tongue man in the earth. He may not be those 稳重型.... But he is indeed a HK man who many women admire. I really look forward to him taking up more TV series. Miss his shows actually... Haha.. I still prefer to watch him as a policeman, or a devoted man. 

Chilam, u are always my idol....