Tomb Sweeping

It's been 2 years ever since i went tomb sweeping with my maternal side relatives.. this year i'm back into action..


in the past, i'll never b absent for tomb sweeping.. n every year when we went tomb sweeping, i would have a lot of emotions, all squeezing into my heart, which made me sad.. all bcoz this is my maternal grandpa, who loved me so much..



He passed away when i was around P4.. I was so sad.. I could still roughly remembered, when he was lying in the hosp, so sick.. i went to visit him after school, mum n dad brought us there.. Though i was still young tat time, but i could understand the language they were talking about.. (cantonese)..



After visiting ah gong, tats wat we called him when he was still around.. my parents brought us home 1st.. i remembered them saying to each other that, the doc told them to b mentally prepared that ah gong will not be able to make it after tonight.. i heard it, but i didn't say anything.. just kept quiet n was so sad.. n indeed the next day when we woke up, my ah gong left us..



my po po was so sad.. she cried so badly.. we did not go to school, was at the funeral.. i was asked to stay at the funeral, to burn the incense paper, all bcoz my ah gong loved me the most, out of all grandchildren tat he had.. though i didn't say out my emotions tat time, but no 1 knew i was so sad.. even til now, when i need to talk abt my ah gong, my tears will roll...



i've not seen my ah gong for the past 2 years.. n this year i got to see him again.. i told him abt my marriage, my husband who came with me this time, which was also his 1st time paying respect to my ah gong, told him abt my son Jaden.. asked ah gong for his blessings, n asked him to bless my family happiness..



Still, the one who was the most emotional was my po po.. the moment she started talking to my ah gong, she cried again, n i was SO sad.. my 5th uncle was sad too, so he quickly changed the topic, n then we all brought my popo away.. to prevent her from getting so sad as she is already so old..



After leaving, we all went to have breakfast b4 going on our separate ways.. When Jaden is older n more sensible, i will bring him over n pay respects to ah gong.. want ah gong to see my life now.. it's always so sentimental everytime i think of my ah gong.. coz he really loved me so much..



There's a lot of feelings to say... but dunno where to start n how to start.. can u imagine that now i'm blogging, n i'm crying too?? ah gong has left us for 18 years, n i still missed him so much, n remembered his time with us, with me when i was young.. can imagine that how close we were b4 he passed on... 18 years, so long already.. but no matter how many years he had left us, my po po is the 1 who missed him the most.. I hope my ah gong can be reincarnated to a good family who loves him n will nurture him.. n he can be v happy n healthy..



i will miss u ah gong!